I decided to do a little something fun for this blog post. I recently had a thread on Facebook where I asked other authors to give reasons why writers are insane. And they were all valid...but these are what I consider the top reasons why you see writers sitting in a corner with their eyes darting everywhere.
Or, it could just be the excessive amounts of coffee. *shrug*
Anyway, here it is….5 Reasons Why Writers Are Insane.
1. The Editing Process
Oh, the editing. As if we haven’t spent enough time and attention to the writing process as we’ve lovingly crafted our book, now we get to obsess over it all again.
Every. Single. Word.
We’re combing through our manuscripts, muttering about how we could write such crap and how it’ll never be finished or be good enough, all while making up creative cuss words as we go. But we don’t write them down.
Because we’d probably have to edit them, too.
2. The Voices
Those crazy characters, they seem to take on a life of their own, don’t they? Especially the ones who nag, relentlessly, for writers to tell their story. And usually at the most inconvenient times. In the shower, while driving down the road or doing the dishes. Or, my personal favorite, in the five seconds before you finally fall asleep. At which point you have two options: either wake up long enough to write them down and hope you can make sense of it later or lie to yourself about remembering it in the morning and fall asleep anyway.
And don’t get me started about trying to argue with them. Give it up, you’ll never win.
3. Two words: Elevator Pitch
Ever have someone ask what you do for a living and suddenly, you’re standing there, slack-jawed and brain dead, unable to think of a single word other than 'uh'? The panic that sets in because you're a writer and words are failing you and you're standing there, kind of drooling on yourself.
Imagine having that happen every time someone asks you about a book you’ve written. And if you have multiple titles, forget about it.
Just hug yourself, it’ll help you get ready for the straight jacket they’ll fit you for later.
4. Your Little Hobby
So, you’ve decided to become a writer. Congratulations! You’ll spend countless hours researching, writing, editing before you finally - FINALLY - get your book published. Great feeling, right? So you’ll repeat the process, again and again. And just when you’re starting to feel really good about yourself, you’ll get that one person who says “you’re a writer, I’ll bet you’re making all kinds of money” or worse “I’ll bet it’s a fun hobby, the writing thing. Good for you.”
When this happens, do not - I repeat DO NOT - stab them in the eye with your pen. No matter how much you want to, you have to restrain yourself. Psychotic is not how you want to be described in court records.
Those are made public, you know.
5. We’re Superheroes
At least, we think we are. We don’t sleep enough, drink too much coffee (if there were such a thing, which I’m not convinced there is) and we create people and places out of thin air. Pretty cool, huh? Well, we also tend to take on more than we can reasonably handle. Case in point: “Oh, I have an idea for another story. It’s a really good one and I can’t wait to get started. I’m already writing fifteen books this year. What’s one more?” I know many authors - myself included - deal with this on the daily. It keeps things interesting, to say the least.
Now, somebody pour me some more coffee and pass me my cape. I have work to do.